I remember when I got my first bread machine, a gift from my mother many years ago, when bread machines were fairly new. I was so excited! Homemade bread, right at my fingertips anytime I wanted.
Somewhere I had read an article about bread machines and it said that you could make croissants. Immediately, I saw my future laid out for me. I was going to be the Croissant Queen of South Austin. I had no idea who the Croissant Queen of North/East/West Austin was going to be, but I had South Austin covered. Yes, indeed, I had goals; I had plans; I had ingredients; I had a recipe; I had a bread machine. I was going to set the machine on its timer and have warm, fresh croissants ready to take to work when I left the house in the morning.
I had delusions of grandeur.
The book that came with the machine had a recipe for making croissants. Or, rather, for making croissant dough, through the first kneading. I still would have had to take out the dough, let it rise, knead it again, let it rise, separate and shape the croissants and then bake them. That put a definite kink in my Croissant Queen plan. There was no way I was going to do any of that before I went to work in the mornings. Or, as it turns out, ever.
Instead, I bought biscuits and honey in the Popeyes drive-through window for my co-workers. (Popeyes was open for breakfast at the time.) My co-workers never missed the croissants they never knew about.
(I want to put an apostrophe in “Popeyes” but the web site does not use one. It’s their name, so I left out the apostrophe. Their web site also says that the restaurant was named after Popeye Doyle, a character in the movie The French Connection. Who knew?)